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 Post subject: What are positive strong sibling bonds like?
PostPosted: Wed Feb 08, 2017 11:26 am 
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You might guess from the subject that I don't have siblings. Honestly, there are several suboptimal ways kids can grow up and I hit my share.

In TDW 1429.3 I want to show "pinky promise siblings" Jo and Mon becoming closer and choosing to stay kids instead of dealing with all the "mushy stuff" Al lost and Wilbur and Gray are facing.

What does a positive and strong sibling relationship feel like? What does it look like to others? How is it impacted when the siblings are of different genders? How might the choice to be a sibling vice birth affect things?

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 Post subject: Re: What are positive strong sibling bonds like?
PostPosted: Wed Feb 08, 2017 4:54 pm 
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I think I'm confused by what you mean. I have strong bonds with my siblings, but they are my blood siblings, like, we have the same parents. We don't pinky promise on squat.

But I've also had my share of "Best friends" that are basically siblings (which is what "pink promise siblings" sounds like to me). So I can give you perspective on either, but I really don't get what you mean to ask.

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 Post subject: Re: What are positive strong sibling bonds like?
PostPosted: Wed Feb 08, 2017 9:28 pm 
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In this case the two have "pinky promised" to treat each other as brother and sister. There's some backstory to it, and this book delves into it more In their minds they are as close as brother and sister, given that Jo is an only child and Mon has lots of siblings younger and older. Mon is very much a "Champion" archetype.

Make more sense? I don't have siblings at all, really, and have no idea what the relationships are like.

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 Post subject: Re: What are positive strong sibling bonds like?
PostPosted: Wed Feb 08, 2017 10:12 pm 
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I would think a "positive and strong sibling relationship" would feel like any truly strong, positive friendship. And that's how it would look to others except, I'd imagine possibly that some who knew they weren't blood siblings might suspect they are more than siblings, especially being different genders?

I have 4 siblings, 2 of each gender. And I have varying levels of sibling relationship with each of them. As the years pass, I have grown closer with one, away from another - it's the same as any relationship. Many siblings that were close growing up drift away as adults and many siblings that fought constantly may or may not become closer as they grow up.

One of the biggest things, I would think, that distinguishes a sibling relationship is just the history between the siblings. And the ease, not only in getting along and being familiar with each other, but in silly squabbles being a normal, unimportant, part of the day.

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 Post subject: Re: What are positive strong sibling bonds like?
PostPosted: Thu Feb 09, 2017 5:57 pm 
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More or less like any strong friendship, I think. The difference would be a sense of duty, because family has a strong meaning in most societies, and also a sense of being unable to get rid of the person. Friendships can be broken off, familial relations can't really. So you feel like it's a duty and also a necessity to maintain the relationship. You also have a lot of history, and understand things that outsiders wouldn't. Also, if there is anything stigmatized or bad or weird that one of them is involved with, the siblings are pretty likely to know, so there's a sense of carelessness--you don't have to worry about doing something stupid in front of them, because they already know you're stupid. Basically I think a combination of duty, carelessness, and inevitability. Obviously you have to add in the aspects of "close friendship" to the mix, but I think those three are the sibling-specific characteristics.

On the flipside, that sense of duty and so on can feel like a burden if you don't have a good relationship. People can shut themselves off from family for that reason. But you didn't ask about that. :)


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 Post subject: Re: What are positive strong sibling bonds like?
PostPosted: Tue Feb 14, 2017 5:14 pm 
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Oh, going along with what Mistress Kidh said, there can also be that deep sense of hurt and betrayal when someone walks away from a familial relationship.

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